“I can’t imagine heaven’s lullabies
and what they must sound like,
but I will rest in knowing,
heaven is your home
and it’s all you’ll ever know…”
Glory baby, Watermark
“Lord, nganong gikuha man nimo si Jan-jan uy?” It was a lighthearted question from Jon, asking God why He took his little sister. No, I didn’t sense a hint of bitterness or blame.
We were talking about my niece - little Jan-jan, cute Jan-jan… chinky eyes, rosy cheeks, black hair, chubby and healthy, picture perfect baby, who left us when she was only 3 months old. Her Mom woke up to find her little body lifeless beside her. It was such great sorrow for a mother to let go of her baby daughter at such an early age. The cause of death was unexplainable, a case of SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome) which usually happens to seemingly healthy babies younger than 1 year old. I remember how it was so painful for my sis-in-law that time to accept her death. It was as if nothing could take away the hurt and misery she felt. That was about ten years ago.
It was a sunny Monday afternoon, when Jan-jan’s remains were transferred from the old public cemetery to the Mactan Island Memorial Garden (MIMG). Now she has a new home. It was her second burial. We waited for my big bro and sis-in-law at the memorial garden, and finally they arrived, with a white box. My sis-in-law related to us how the hired men at the old cemetery took out her little bones with her white dress, socks, and gloves still on, soiled but not rotten, how her bones looked so tiny, how they transferred them to a white box, wrapped it with white cloth and sealed with a ribbon. She now spoke with much fondness and love, no more traces of pain.
I watched pensively as a man placed the box in the pit, covered it with concrete slab, sealed it with mortar, then used a shovel to cover it with soil. Jan-jan could have been a little girl by now. I know she could have been a joy to her Dad and Mom, a malambing and kulit sister to her Kuya and Ate, and a doting sister to little Josh. The square of bermuda grass was finally placed on top of the soil. Candles were lit and we gathered around and said a prayer for Jan-jan, a little angel watching over us.
my condolences carey.
God only knows why this things happen but i agree with you that there’s a cute little angel looking down on you guys right now
It is really sad. The same happened to our “kasimanwa” in Montreal with their first born, and their was an Inquest. We can’t avoid it here. Any such child death always results in an inquest, especially for a healthy child, but that inquest help a lot of other parents because it brought awareness to SIDS and also brought some kind of relief to the parents to hear from the Inquest that they fate of the child was unavoidable, yet still sad…
Posted by vic at March 8, 2007, 10:58 pmhi carry.. it broke my heart… =( I read a book about death.. and it says babies who die early are made into angels…
Posted by ysa at March 9, 2007, 7:49 amsigh. my cousin died the same way. *hikbi*
Posted by chelsea at March 9, 2007, 7:56 amcarey, your post inspired me to share also the death of an officemate’s child.
Posted by raine... again at March 9, 2007, 12:54 pmHi Carey,
Thanks for droppin in and asking how was I.
I’m really sorry for what happened to your niece. No words could ever heal the pain they went through.
I just hope that beyond this world…someday, she will be reunited with her mom and dad.
God bless!
Posted by jef at March 10, 2007, 11:16 amSad… but such is life. 
Sexy mom: yes, 10 years have passed… time truly heals.
Raine: we really can’t comprehend how life is sometimes…though we trust God knows best.
Posted by ideasnpink at March 10, 2007, 10:29 pmVic: SIDS awareness is really important for the parents, it means that even if babies are not sickly, they still are not exempted from the possibility of death.
Ysa: oh, which book is that? yes, I’ve heard that too… babies who died are already angels, coz they’re innocent and pure, even the unborn children who are victims of abortion or whose deaths were caused by miscarriage.
Chelsea: really, how old was your cousin then? kawawa ang family di ba, esp. yung mother
Posted by ideasnpink at March 11, 2007, 12:15 amRaine: ows… another topic for you to blog about. 
Jef: you’re welcome, tagal mo na kasing di nakapa- update. yes, someday, we will be reunited with cute Jan-jan. *sigh*
Snglguy: losing our loved ones …. such a sad part of our lives talaga sngl.
Sorry about your lost. You have another angel watching over you. Hope you feel a lot better and God bless!!!
Posted by Carmela at March 24, 2007, 6:46 amCarmela: thanks for the concern, well, we have accepted the loss, though sometimes we just can’t help but think of what could have been. God bless you too! and thanks for the visit.
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Ideas are powerful. A train of thought can make or break, build or destroy. The choice is ours. Our ideas become our future. I believe that life’s meaningful lessons are best learned when shared with others.
truly, time heals…and baby Jan-Jan is watching over all of you
Posted by sexy mom at March 8, 2007, 3:56 pm